How to Give Serendipity a Chance in your Search of a Soul Mate

These are the times of speed dates, instant marriages and quickie divorces. When things are so rushed and the biological clock ticking away, singles can hardly be blamed for partner hunting in a structured and streamlined manner. Thus you have singles’ bars, clubs, cruises and brunches, all geared to help you find you ‘the one’. And yet the appearance of a soulmate – the one with who you share a deep unique bond – can’t always be forced. Often you have to give serendipity a chance to make things possible and help you unite with the love of your life. So keep in mind these following tips and who knows, may be a series of happy chances would take you to the person you are meant to be with.

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Who is your soul-mate?

If you are searching for your soulmate, first you need to find your own soul. Think about what makes you happy and what makes you feel sad. Ponder on your past and see how they have shaped the person you are today. Also ask yourself what your dreams and aspirations for the future are. Only when you are able to understand the desires and the motivations of your deepest self, you can recognize the person who will respond to and help you fulfill them.

Try new experiences

The secret to finding your soulmate through serendipity is to lay yourself open to new experiences; instead of getting wasted at the bar on yet another singles’ night, look around for new things to do and try – who knows, a happy chance might bring you face to face with the love of your life. So if you have never patronized anything other than coffee shops and no-fuss bars, here is your chance to sign up with a wine appreciation club. A wine-tasting event in your city and a wine-tasting tour which takes you through some of the loveliest vineyards on earth are events with great socializing potential. Once in a while get out of doors not to complete a chore or go to work but just to see something you like. A good idea is to attend an exhibition, a public display or a trade show. These could be organized around fine arts, cuisine, electronics, handicrafts, home decor, automobiles and a whole range of other themes. Travelling by yourself is one of the best ways to explore not just a new place but also who you are. Also heading out alone will increase your chances of being sought out by a co-traveler whereas being with a companion may make you appear to be in a relationship and thus unavailable. If you cannot take out several days at a time, think about joining an adventure club. Go hiking, cycling or camping in the company of other enthusiasts and you just might end up meeting someone with who shares with you much more than a passion for the beauties of nature. Browse through bookstores, visit a museum or attend a flower show – all these can be highly pleasurable ways of spending leisure time and what’s more they usually draw crowds from a large cross-section of society.

Take a class

The classroom has always been a great place to meet potential partners - partly because students in a class are drawn together by common subjects and interests and partly because of the atmosphere of openness and exchange. So think of something that you always wanted to know more about like maybe Medieval Christian Art or Marxist economic theories and then look for short-term courses or refresher courses teaching these subjects. And when you notice a particularly attractive classmate, you can always ask for his/her help in understanding a difficult passage or in completing your term paper. If you wish for something lighter, take a cinema appreciation course over the weekend or sign up at a hobby class to learn something entirely new – like perhaps glass painting or photography. Learning to dance again may reap rich dividends in your personal life – it will therefore not only help you to move with confidence but also get you in touch with other students of your class, thus laying open the chances of finding someone who may turn out to be more than a dance partner. One of the most exciting things to pick up in the nature of additional skills is a new language.  Attending a language class in fact makes for a great way to know new people since you will come in contact with teachers and other students. Best of all, learning a new language throws open the gates to  a whole new culture and a way of life which in turn will bring you closer to people of the particular linguistic community. Likewise with a cooking class - think food with exotic tastes like Lebanese or with formal arrangement of colors like Japanese. Apart from indulging in some of the most delicious cuisine, you will get a chance to make new acquaintances in such a cookery class. Again if you if you are tired of running in the early morning fog or fed up with meeting the same people in the neighborhood gym, how about taking up a new sport. It could be something like tennis or badminton that you have always to learn but never really got around to trying. Look up your city telephone directory for sports schools or contact your community center for classes which they may have for beginners. This way you will come in contact with an entire group of people you never knew before and may even discover an attractive partner to practice your backhand with and later perhaps take it from there to other things.

Look for ways to meet new people

It is difficult to come across the love of your life, if your entire social circle consists of just three single co-workers or the same four guys with whom you hang out at the bar. Rather find ways of changing the social scene so that you can come across new people. An excellent idea is to organize a Sunday pot luck lunch and ask each of the regulars in your group to bring along a new guest. At the same time, see if you can accompany a cousin, sibling or a friend to parties at their neighborhoods and offices, wherever you may not have frequented till now. Even getting in touch with friends from school or those to whom you haven’t spoken for years may help in widening your social circle and who knows may even bring you across someone you would like to know better. Though the workplace is a less-favored venue for finding dates, you can never be sure where true love may be hiding, lying in wait for you. So look around for single and attractive colleagues not only at your own workplace but also among those who may be working in other departments or on other floors of your office building. Office parties held on Christmas Eve where everyone is usually allowed to bring in guests can also serve as useful opportunities to meet new people through your workplace.  Attend a book launch in a nearby city or get membership to a gym that is outside the pale of your immediate neighborhood or workplace. This will expose you to a more varied dating pool and help you skip those faces who you frequently come across your workplace or local grocery store. If nothing else, watch a play simply to patronize the amateur theatre groups from your town or city, which are in fact much more affordable than professional companies and sometimes more enjoyable too. You will end up meeting lots of people from your community and over time perhaps even get to know an attractive regular over discussions on Shakespeare or Sheppard. One of the strongest points of the bond between a couple is their belief in common values. And if you enjoy doing your bit for the community, what better way to meet the love of your life than through volunteering? For meeting places with fun potential, it is hard to beat parades, country fairs and community festivals. The pervading atmosphere of fun and festivity at these events makes people more sociable than they would otherwise be and thus makes for a perfect time to seek a companion. In all these ways welcome all chances of meeting new and interesting people and who knows you may come across your soul-mate in the unlikeliest of places.

Vary your routine

Sometimes you may need to shake up things a little so that Chance gets a new way of entering your life with happy romantic possibilities. For instance If you have exhausted all dating possibilities at your workplace, look for a new venue. This does not mean that you chuck your daytime job but only that you look for an interesting place where you can put in a few hours of work, a few times every week. Such part-time work will not only bring you in contact with people from different walks of life but In fact could even turn out to be fun - like playing Santa at Christmas time could be a good way to meet single parents. Then again being stuck in the same job over several years can leave little scope of meeting new people. If your circumstances permit, perhaps you can look for another job where you have greater chance of coming across a wider variety of people. For instance if you are good with computers, instead of being shut behind a cubicle in an internet firm all day, see if you can design software for schools or other training institutes. You need not always opt for a major change – you can vary your schedule with small alterations too. For instance If you use your car to commute to work, chances are that the only kind of interaction you have on your way and back is in the nature of road rage. Rather take the bus or tube to your work and you may be thrown in proximity with an occasional attractive commuter or over time get to know a few faces really well. Either way, being closeted together in the bus or coach for some time can make for some valuable opportunities to begin an introduction.

Be receptive to new possibilities

One of the secrets in finding the person most compatible to your personality is to be open to new possibilities. For instance, the online dating profile of a potential date might say that he is into adventure sports while you are more of a homebody. This does not mean that he cannot possess qualities like compassion and a sense of humor, qualities which rate higher in your scale of priorities in a partner than a love of indoor games. And if you happen to dismiss this person outright or refuse to meet him on the basis of a chance remark, you may be losing a valuable opportunity of meeting the right person. Again, say a friend cancels an evening at the bowling alley saying that he/she has been given tickets for two to an opera performance and asks if you would like to come. Now even if classical music isn’t your forte, go along simply to experience something different from your usual choice in music. Likewise, if you are asked to babysit a nephew, just this once oblige your sibling instead of coming up with an excuse. Who knows the pretty usher at the concert or the handsome neighbor at your sister’s place might show more than a passing interest in you.

Be willing to take risks

In your serendipitous search for a soulmate, do not shy away from taking risks or you will be passing up on significant chances of meeting your soul-mate. You may feel awkward about saying hello to a girl in the coffee shop who is reading Kafka but if you believe that the book indicates a mutual interest in philosophy and the understanding of life go ahead and take the chance. It might lead to a meaningful relationship or you may find out that the girl is merely leafing through the book to complete a course assignment.  Should a friend or family member happen to set you up for a blind date, trust your luck and set forth with a positive mind. Look forward to spend a nice evening and even if it has not been particularly scintillating company, it beats sitting in front of the telly and munching on fries anytime. Also understand that when you ask someone out, you will get turned down occasionally. But don’t let this dampen your search for your soul-mate since a few refusals are nothing when compared to the immense satisfaction of finding the love of your life.

Finally have faith

Finding a soul-mate through serendipity is not exactly looking for someone to go bowling with on a Friday night. Realize that it will take time to find the person with whom you share your essential values and life goals. The only thing here is to bide your time and keep looking. Soul-mates have usually been described as two halves of an entity, the combination of yin and yang or any two principles which come together to make a meaningful whole. So have faith that your soul-mate is out there somewhere and keep looking instead of giving way to doubt and disillusionment.