First Date Etiquette - Tips and Advice
A first date can be a potential minefield of misconstrued replies and half-understood impressions. A lot of what you do on a first date makes or breaks the possibility of getting a second date. A few tips on first date etiquette so that you are not only able to avoid the usual pitfalls but in fact make your first date a pleasant experience both for you and your partner.
Pick her up and drop her home
Relationship experts believe that for the first date, it is expected from a guy that he will pick up his partner from her place and drop her at the end of the evening. A woman might demur at the idea and offer to meet her partner at a convenient place but unless she has very strong reasons to keep the guy away from her home, it is best that a guy offers to do the right thing. This gesture is not only gentlemanly in a romantic way but in fact shows concern for his partner’s safety and well-being.
TIP: Click here to see pics and videos of single women and men in your city looking for dates.
Be on time
Punctuality is not just appreciated during career interviews and board meetings. It is equally important to be on time for your date, whether you are going to pick her up from her home or meeting her somewhere. By the same token, a woman should also be careful not to keep her partner waiting. Apart from causing inconvenience to the person who has arrived on time, your being late conveys carelessness and an inability for time-management. If at all you are caught up in circumstances beyond your control, ring up your date, apologize and mention how much longer you might be.
Courtesy
Small acts of social courtesy like holding the door open or pulling up the chair for your date is sure to make a very good first impression. However be careful not to race to the door in order to hold it open for your partner since this might make you come off desperate to seek validation. Walk naturally beside your partner and should you reach the door first, hold it open for her to pass through. And if she happens to reach the door first, you can reach over and hold it open, allowing her to walk through. At the same time if you are at the receiving end of such courtesy, it would be nice if you could respond with a smile and a small thank-you. Even if you don’t believe in such gestures, this is not the time or place to announce your kind of gender politics. Just appreciate the gesture and be ready to enjoy the evening.
Give and take during conversation
On your first date, it might take a few moments to get the conversation going. This would be natural but come prepared with a few things you might want to discuss. Hobbies, interests, favorite kind of music or movies are usually the safest topics of conversation and allow both sides to contribute their share. If you are too quiet, your partner might feel you are uninterested in the date or worse, emotionally distant and unlikely to warm up to the relationship. On the other hand, if you monopolize the conversation and merely talk about yourself, you would be in danger of coming off as egotistic and a megalomaniac. So the important thing here is to keep a balance. Also while it is a good thing to ask questions, avoid probing too deeply into personal matters like family and finances until you know the person better. Again when you speak to your date, make sure you make eye contact; there is no need to stare but allowing your gaze to drift all over the room instead of keeping it on her/him would imply that you are bored and disinterested.
Switch off the phone
You do that during a board meeting or even music concert, so why not on your date? Turn off your mobile phone and Bluetooth so that you are not interrupted repeatedly on this most special of evenings. When you are on a date, your partner deserves to be the object of your complete attention. It is not only awkward for him or her to sit twiddling their thumbs while you talk on your phone but in fact it is quite rude on your part to ignore them like that. Many people think that being bombarded with a lot of phone call and text messages during a meeting will make them appear important but in truth it not only reveals a lack of social grace but actually a tendency to shallow vanity. If at all you must keep your phone on, mention to your partner that you are expecting an important call but be sure to ignore non-essential calls.
Pick up the tab
Paying for the drinks and dinner constitutes one of the most delicate points in contemporary dating. While in the earlier days, it was understood that the guy will pick up the check, in these times of gender equality things are no longer so simple. You may have a wonderful evening of conversation and dinner but when it is time for the check to arrive, you and your partner may both feel awkward. This is because men are no longer sure whether they should pay for the dinner straightaway according to convention or wait for their partner to split the bill so as not to offend their gender sensibilities. Again women don’t know if their remaining quiet might make them come off as stingy or their eagerness to split the bill might offend their male partners. Contemporary dating experts believe that for the first date, the guy should still be the one to pay. However do this in as obtrusive a manner as possible so there is no awkwardness when the dinner is over. A good idea for the guy is to hand over his credit card to the waiter at the beginning so that everything is taken care of without an agonizing discussion.
Finally be your natural self on your date and don’t appear too artificial. First date etiquette merely offers a useful guide on what to avoid on this special evening so that you don’t make the most common mistakes. However remember to reveal the best part of the person you really are and the evening will surely end with your companion eager to see you again.
- Log in to post comments